A selfish act.
Whatever it was that caused you and someone you love to call it quits. Shit happened and you broke up.
Girls cry, we get mad, we play tough, cry again, maybe call over an old fuck buddy, tweet through it, fuck through it, cry, eat ice cream and convince ourselves that it will work out.
Men act tough, shrug their shoulders....meh....whatevz. After 3 weeks they're glued to a rum bar and reliving all the good days with a sistren....cus of course, they cant have that kinda talk with the niggas. They fuck through it, tweet hardcore shit. Get their nob slobbed by their back-up bitch (They all have one). Drink some more ...at home this time, grow a beard, tweet. They're ok (not).
There's something quite.....painful...about seeing someone you know, inside and out, and not being able to speak to them. When you so happen to be around them and they laugh about something someone said to them and it hits you....you haven't heard that laugh in months. They walk pass you and their scent body slams you into the lockers of memories you carefully stowed away in the dungeons of your brain and heart. All you can do is turn your head and focus real hard on that....that...tile in front of you. Gorgeous tile.
You start wondering exactly how long this period of healing and self love and getthefuckoveritalready is supposed to last. You dont wanna be friends, you cant be friends. Impossible.
You happen upon them on lunch date. No big deal. Just flip over their table and dance in their food and walk out right? Fuck yea. You're not jealous, you're healing.
*drops on the floor and cries like smeagol*
Scroll through your phone book and linger on their name for a few seconds...hmmm.... *turns phone in hands*... yes... you're gonna call and try to talk it out. Nahh...save yourself the embarrassment.....and credit.
Tweet through it.
You live your life, work, home, work, home, rinse and repeat...sprinkled with a night out, a few dates, meaningless sex. After a while that tugging in your heart either goes away or learns to shut the hell up ( i think)
There's love....then there's LOVE....then there's JEZAS CRISE MI GET TIE A WAH DIS GAD?!
After 2 or 3 .....shit...or more years....you find someone and you're happy. You settle down and you start thinking about marriage...
What if, the love you have for your current boo...isnt as strong as what you had/have for your ex? What do you do? Have you wondered that? if you'll find this kind of deep, passionate, wonderful love again?